How the kids came to be...

When I was fresh out of college, I applied for a job in Akron working as a child protection caseworker.  I didn't have a clue what the job entailed, but for some reason, most likely desperation on their part, I got hired.  I loved the job, especially at first.  I had an AWESOME supervisor and I learned a lot-about the job, about myself, and about life in general.  When we moved two and a half years later, I had many things that really stuck with me about my time there.  One was my ongoing love for small towns.  I was not-am not-one of those people who couldn't wait to move to the city.  I'm actually still trying to escape the city back to the country! The next was what I affectionately refer to as The Case From Hell.  It earned its capital letters about three times over.  Lastly, I learned how important it is to have a really great supervisor when you have a really stressful, difficult job.  Even better for me though, was that I really valued the friendship I had with my supervisor and I loved and respected her.  It was the single hardest part about moving away.  We stayed in touch after I left with random updates.



When she emailed me in late 2010, with the subject line "Hello," I didn't think much of it, until I actually read the email.  She said she didn't know where we were at with things, but that Little Man and Little Miss had been in foster care for awhile, and there was the possibility they would need a forever home.  Then she sent their pictures. 



Little Man

Little Miss



Little Man (age 5) and Little Miss (age 4)



We joked that she knew what our answer would be before she sent the email, because she knew that we got our puppies after seeing a black and white photocopied flier on a bulletin board!  Anyway, to say that their pictures were adorable would be an understatement.  But Cori and I had not talked about adopting older children (they were nearly 5 and nearly 6 at the time) and we were in our black hole of hopelessness, so we hadn't really been planning anything as far as next steps were concerned.  After much thought and prayerful consideration, we decided to go ahead with getting licensed as a foster home and see what happened as far as the case was concerned.  By the summer of 2011, we were officially licensed, and man, were those foster care classes a joke!  I felt bad for the people were had no idea what they were getting into because those classes certainly didn't educate them like they should have.  We met the kids for the first time in July 2011.  They were even cuter in person, if that was possible!  We wanted the kids to move to our home before school began in the fall of 2011, but that was not meant to be.  We didn't feel like things were ever going to move along and that we would be in limbo forever.  The kids began to stay weekends with us to prep for the transition to our home.  Finally, on December 20, 2011, they moved to our home.  It was strange to be so eager for something to happen that was so traumatic for their birth family, and for the kids.  We, mainly I, really struggled with this.  After working in the field for so long, I knew how hard of a situation the kids were coming from, both from the trauma they had experienced at home, to the trauma of being taken from that home and losing their family, to the grief of their birth family.  It was hard to be joyful for us when I knew how much grief other people, including the kids, were dealing with.  Even with all the horrible things I've seen, I still really believe that birth parents love their children.  They may not care for them, and they may even hurt them, but they don't love them any less (and this is probably the least cynical thing you will ever hear me say about my profession, so take note!)  Finally I just had to move past that and trust that we were doing the right thing.  The kids weren't really aware of why we had been spending time with them and didn't know what the plan was, so the move was a shock for them.  Then with Christmas being just five days later, things got very chaotic and crazy, and it did not go smoothly concerning the previous foster home and the move to our house.  But we were so happy to finally have them with us and to start getting to know each other!  The kids started school here in January and they were pretty behind.  I'm not sure if it was due to the difference in school systems or just not getting enough attention where they were before, but we had a lot of work to do!  Thankfully, they started catching up quickly.  Things have been an absolute whirlwind for the last seven months.  There have been ups and downs, just as any family would have.  The shock of going from no kids to two kids that need active parenting (not just bottles and new diapers) for not only typical issues but special needs was pretty big.  We had to figure out how to discipline, be consistent, co-parent, clean the house, work, etc. etc. all in a short time frame.  Luckily I was able to take a month off of work to be with the kids, and since they were on Christmas Break from school, we had a lot of good time together.