I have FINALLY figured out how to work Pinterest. As in the entire thing, not just what comes up from the pinners that are somehow connected to me. And it rocks! I came across a quote but I have no idea who to attribute it to. However, I've been thinking about all day, and I'm still not sure why it's snagged my attention so thoroughly. Maybe it's because I need to heed its advice, and maybe it's because I know how impossible that can be. I'm not sure. But it's definitely food for thought. What do you think?
Don't let your struggle become your identity.
In my experience, and from talking to my not-so-fertile friends, it seems that a couple facing infertility goes through periods of time when not only does infertility completely define you, but completely consumes every waking thought. From scheduling tests to making doctor's appointments, to tracking cycle days and taking your temperature every. single. morning. when the alarm goes off, it's super easy to let it take over. Ask any infertile lady friend what cycle day she is on, and I guarantee she can tell you with zero hesitation. There are some days that I truly, honestly believe that I know more about the human reproductive system and conception than your average doctor (and if you've read the first post about our infertility experience, you can see why I think that.) Want to know the latest information about miscarriage statistics? Ask an infertile. Want to know where the best research studies are happening? Ask an infertile. Where to get the cheapest Clomid? Simple. Target is three times cheaper than Walgreens. The list goes on ad nauseum. Of course, there are some really great things about this. For example, certain tests MUST be done on certain cycle days. You have to be able to track this accurately. Certain medications must be taken at exactly the same time every day for them to be most effective. And at $300 a shot (literally) you better be able to make it happen. When you are searching for a child to be placed with you for adoption, you never know when you might stumble across the opportunity you have been waiting for. But it's hard to live in this state of constant hyper-awareness of the reality of your life. Cori and I almost didn't go to a family reunion one year because I was scheduled to have a certain injection right in the middle of the vacation. And this medication had to be refrigerated, so traveling 9 hours by car to the reunion seemed impossible. However, we figured out a way to make it work and got our doctor's blessing, so we went. But there are definitely times that I avoid situations that I know will be too much to handle. And the reality is also that sometimes you can't avoid situations that are hard, and sometimes it takes you completely off guard. I know I don't have the answer as to how balance things. Anybody could tell you that I am terrible at it actually. How do you define yourself as anything other than what you try to overcome?
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